Not the "put a ring on it" conversation yet, but the "when are you moving in" question.
I, honestly, have been avoiding it. We've been together for more than a year and sure, this is not untimely. I just turned 27 and if this is really serious, then we better start talking about the future.
Brought this up to my mother today (she is straight up Catholic and Filipino - most strict combination ever). Surprisingly, I didn't get yelled nor cussed at. She calmly told me how it is against our beliefs and traditions but it is ultimately my decision. Whew. Well that's one chip off my shoulder. But she does have a point. Granted my boyfriend and I are no longer "innocent" I would still like to value the old ways by not shacking in before marriage. On the other hand, I am about done being a freeloader and have been ready to move back out. I just didn't anticipate that the next time I get my own place, I'd have to share it.
Maybe I am selfish, still. Or my independence and commitment issues are in first gear. My boyfriend, by all means, is expectedly a great house man. He assembles furniture, he can cook, and he has picked up after me plenty of times. The question is, am I able to do the same for him? What if he doesn't like me at home? What if I become too messy or lazy to cook for him? What if I don't want to share my bathroom or closet space?
There are so many what if's which triggers me to think, I should just give in. Grow up, man up, and do this to better my relationship and build a foundation with the man I want to have a future with. I still have about three months to fully commit to this but since I'm leaning more towards yes, I might as well start reading cookbooks and practice cleaning.
Oh why do I have to be a woman...
Labels: The Struggle
